Chinese Dogs Sent into Space for What?

In 1957, Laika the dog was launched into space orbit by the Soviets, blazing a path for human spaceflight. Today, the Chinese regularly launch dogs into space with their own astronauts.

There is a notable difference in the designated role of the dog between the two space programs. The Soviets sent Laika into orbit primarily to determine whether humans could survive weightlessness in space.

The Chinese send dogs, or as they are widely known in the western world, Man’s Best Friend, into space as part of a healthy breakfast, or whatever meal they are consumed as a menu item.

The UK Telegraph reports that Former astronaut and China’s first man in space, Yang Liwei, commander of the Shenzhou five 2003 space mission explains in his autobiography, The Nine Levels Between Heaven and Earth, “Many of my friends are curious about what we eat [in space] and think that the astronauts must have some expensive delicacies, like shark’s fin or abalone. Actually we ate quite normal food, there is no need to keep it a secret.”

One item that stands out on the listed menu of normal items includes dog meat, specifically, the type sourced in Huajiang County in Guangdong, which is esteemed in China for its nutritional benefits. Not significantly, dog shared the menu on day three of Liwei's mission with baby cuttlefish casserole and eel with green pepper.

Hope I’m not making everyone too hungry to read to the end of this post.

To capsulize, somebody in the Chinese space program made the decision that shark fin was too extravagant for space missions, but dog as a nutritious, yet familiar, comfort food would contribute to the fitness and focus of the astronauts in the performance of their mission, and that there is no need to keep this a secret. Tough call, but you gotta just trust the experts in these things.

Does this post have a point, you ask? Well, no, not a very strong one, other than, it can help make some sense of things to view people and their activities in their cultural context. That, and the term “puppy chow” might lose a lot in translation depending on how good the foreign language dictionary is that you might be relying on.

A few years ago here in Kona, while waiting to pick up baby girl from middle school, a ten or eleven year-old girl passed my car while walking her pet Vietnamese pot-bellied pig on its leash. I watched the two of them stroll down the sidewalk until they turned the corner. disappearing from sight. In some (probably only non-gated) subdivisions in Kona, domesticated pigs may be kept as pets. Doesn’t keep me from eating bacon, though.

One of my Filipino buddies here always claimed he had the best recipe for cat. He remained tight lipped about giving up the family recipe, but he did let slip that the secret lay in the ginger. I’ve never personally tasted it at any cookouts or potlucks as far as I’m aware, … maybe, though. He did mention it tasted pretty much like, what was it again? Oh, yeah, cat.

Resolving the Real Men vs. Quiche Controversy

Back in the early 1980’s, Reader’s Digest published excerpts from a book entitled, Real Men Don’t Eat Quiche. The title / statement / opinion insinuated that no manly-type male would ever eat something soft and gummy, like quiche, when instead he could choose to rip into more rugged table fare, like steak or pork chops. Sadly, publication of the article unleashed far-reaching repercussions on the unsuspecting male public.

The book’s title quickly became a slogan of masculine reaffirmation, which, paradoxically, if not naturally, opened up a whole new set of opportunities for humiliation by one’s male peers.

The year the book came out I was playing on a Kona men’s league softball team. A fielding error often led to being called a “quiche-eater,” the implication being that only a squishy, overly-sensitive man like a Phil Donohue, or an Alan Alda, would have missed such an easy play, or perhaps that the fielder must have forgotten to bring his manhood along that day. The accusation usually developed like something along these lines:

“Aaaah! Quiche-eater!

“Who’re you calling a quiche-eater?”

“You, who else? Only a quiche-eater would miss an easy out like that!”

“Oh, yeah? What makes you the expert?

“I’m the captain, the titular head of the team!”

“You’re a titular head, all right!”

“YOU’RE the titular head.”

“No, YOU are!”

“That’s what I said!”

“Okay, then!”

Eventually, quiche-related criticism would wane and play would resume until the next unforgivable error.

I’m sure you can grasp how formative life lessons like this can leave a man apprehensive about ever being caught eating, let alone making, quiche. However, since my masculine self-identity is feeling quite invincible at the moment, I will unflinchingly confess to both.

Yeah, you heard right, I’m admitting it! I made a quiche as a gift for my wife for Mother’s Day. I was in need of some sort of gesture to show appreciation for the five pups kids she popped out. I knew she liked quiche. The rest of us have learned to eat it. Helpfully, she brought home all of the necessary ingredients from the grocery store so that I wouldn’t have to leave the family kennel compound on a special trip to town.

Flowers and a Hallmark card with supplementary, handwritten, emotive sentiments would have been the easy way out, of course. My gift was a much more creative, personal, and quite possibly more-economical, expression of love and appreciation.

I assume, my well-contemplated gift was blissfully received and will reap handsome dividends, relationship-wise, for the near term. I should probably ask though, just to make sure.

Here’s the recipe source. Incidently, don’t worry if all the bacon pieces fall to the bottom. I found out ex post facto that’s to be expected. Also, you may want to use the fancier French cheese (as far as I know, we’re still back on friendly terms with the French) instead of the thriftier Kraft-brand Swiss cheese that I used. I used heavy whipping cream in place of creme fraiche.

Men, you might want to take a shot at this. The recipe is pretty easy and women seem to savor the results. Importantly, almost nobody uses “quiche-eater” as a derogatory expression anymore. In fact, the term has almost passed from the collective male memory, possibly due to resigned acceptance of the U.S. Department of Defense's “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" policy, or maybe from pressure brought to bear on the media from quiche industry-aligned politicians and interest groups.

Whatever the reason, today it’s become possible for real men and quiche to co-exist peacefully to a degree unimaginable a mere three decades ago.

SPAM – It’s What’s for Breakfast!

It is truly unfortunate that whoever coined the term for unwanted email decided on the word “spam”. Why couldn’t he have chosen a more unsavory food name for the usage, perhaps “liver and onions” or “Brussels sprouts,” a.k.a. “little green balls of death,” as described by one fellow blogger? SPAM should connote something deserving of respect.

SPAM, the food-stuff, as produced by Hormel, is the combined product of shoulder pork and ham. It was introduced into the Hawaiian Islands as a military food supply for troops stationed here during the Second World War and was rapidly accepted into the local cuisine. It enjoys an esteemed reputation here in the Hawaiian Islands. Some national, fast-food chain franchises here sell it from their breakfast menus. Rice, of course, accompanies nearly everything, at every meal, locally.

In recognition of the prized position SPAM has earned in Hawaii, and in emulation of various food blogs, today, I’ll be revealing, with commentary, the recipe for my…

SPAMBLED EGGS & RICE SUNDAY BREAKFAST

STEP 1. Push aside enough countertop clutter for prep space (Non-bachelors skip to next step).

STEP 2. Figure out how many people are likely to be out of bed in time for breakfast and select appropriate size of rice cooker. Today, based on an estimated head count of four, I decided to go with the pee-wee.

STEP 3. Measure out rice and wash out dirt and anything else that may have managed to penetrate rice container defenses. Set pan of drained rice, with clean water, in cooker.

STEP 4. Start rice cooker first – important, since the rice will take longer than other items to cook.

STEP 5. Take a big swallow of coffee, because your hands are soon going to get messy.

STEP 6. Check date on bottom of SPAM can. If expired, deposit contents into dog’s bowl. If okay, pull tab on easy-opening top and remove. Turn carton upside down and shake out contents, which we will henceforth accurately refer to as SPAM. Personal observation and rhetorical question: Could you even ask for food to come out leaving its container more clean? And look! Hormel figured out how to get rid of that unappetizing, gloppy, gelatinized residue that used to always be there.

STEP 7. Cut SPAM into ¼” thick slices. Use slicing thickness guide on back of can if necessary. Expect shrinkage to occur during frying.

STEP 8. Brown both sides of SPAM slices in non-stick pan on medium heat. I start the first batch on a very light film of olive oil spray to prevent burning. Look for golden brown color on underside, then flip. It is the caramelization that gives SPAM its full flavor.

STEP 9. Trim off edges of slices and cut into perfect ¾” square tiles (within 1/8” tolerance). You may not care about being this precise, but, as an architect, I like to perform at a certain level of geometric exactitude in my food component preparation whenever possible. The trimmings, seen on the upper right, go into a bag for later use on critical occasions as an incentive in bribing obedience from the dog.

DISCLOSURE: I forgot to make the rice first so, while waiting for the cooker to do its job, I killed time by building a SPAM tower. Collapse appeared imminent and, indeed, structural failure quickly followed with eccentric loading as the probable cause.

Hindsight is easy, of course, but it’s less necessary to play with your food if you start the rice first.

STEP 10. Pour raw, scrambled eggs into pan, cook until safely dry. Add SPAM squares and melt in some shredded Mexican cheese. Those attempting to gain weight may prefer to use 100% Wisconsin cheddar. This main course also can be easily supplemented with ready-to-bake cinnamon rolls.

STEP 11. Remove SPAMbled eggs from heat, serve with customary two scoops rice on compartmentalized paper plate in local eatery fashion. Chopsticks are traditionally used, but I frequently employ the use of a fork, since it produces a higher success/attempt ratio of moving food to mouth. You can experiment to find out which works better for you, particularly when no one is watching.

This high protein, high fat, morning meal would be perfect for providing the energy required for a day’s expedition out on the ice in Antarctica. I, however, use it as fortification for a day of lying in the sun on the beach.

SPAM – not unlike sugar-laden, grain-based, commercially-boxed cereals - it’s part of a healthy breakfast.

A New Year's Tradition

Where has the last week gone? One minute it’s Christmas, you blink a couple of times and it’s nearly New Years Eve. Not to panic, though. There’s still time to form up the annual New Year’s Weight Loss Plan.

Perhaps you engage in this tradition too, the one where, at the change of the year, you set out an unreasonable goal of losing an impossible amount of weight in order “to get back to where you need to be.”

I don’t know if this stems more from obligation or compulsion, social pressure or internalized value, but it’s definitely become an annual tradition, much like ice-bathing for the Polar Bear Club or bathing at all for hippies.

For me, it started up again last night. Sensing I was a little behind schedule, the pressure began building to talk about getting on some sort of diet. Starting off on a diet cold-turkey usually ends in predictable failure so I always try to ease myself into it a little at a time. It helps to be able to see a diet coming so you can brace yourself for impact.

I like to start off by limiting myself to just three meals a day and one dessert per day meal. This is to avoid a shock to your system, which can leave you feeling hungry. Hunger pangs can lead you cheat on your diet so you want to avoid them at all costs.

I go from there to substituting a salad instead of a milkshake as a side to the double-bacon cheeseburger and order the smaller bag of fries, which I think is now called carton-size.

Pizza can be a real diet-slayer, so only eat those on weekends. Alcohol is loaded with empty calories so be sure to drink light beer whenever you eat pizza.

Some experts say exercise is important but watch out, vigorous exercise can also leave you feeling hungry and if you’re trying to stick to the three-meals-a-day plan you may want to avoid any kind of exercise that involves exertion.

Always eat before you go to parties, so that you don’t feel the need to pig out because the food is free. Explain to the hostess that you’re on a diet so she will understand and ask if you can take a “doggie bag” with you to nibble on during the drive home to help avoid those pesky feelings of hunger.

There are other tips to losing weight but most of them are just old wives tales, in my opinion. There is one other useful diet device you might consider: Post a picture of yourself on the refrigerator, taken when you were at the weight you wish to achieve. It can be a great motivator! Here’s the one I put up on my fridge yesterday.

This was nearly 40 years and 65 pounds ago. I think it suitably represents an unreasonable goal of impossible weight loss and should work nicely.

Most Sundays, the Men Cook

To break the routine of the week, most Sundays, the men take over cooking responsibilities for the day at our place . I usually make some kind of breakfast/brunch around nine a.m., mid-day meal we leave everybody to their own plans and Sunday nights we try to come up with table fare that doesn’t require the women to be (heavily, at least) involved.

I pretty much know my way around a kitchen, except for this one in the house that we moved into several weeks ago. It has about three times the cabinet space as our former place and I still haven’t learned the location of everything. Meal prep in this one sometimes makes me feel like I’m driving around lost in L.A. or Chicago, looking for the expressway on-ramp. This can be aggravating, and occasionally humbling, especially when I have to stop what I’m doing to try to find one of the girls to ask for directions to the right cabinet. It’s a guy thing.

Last evening, after a weird weather day of thunder & lightning (rare for Kona, yeah?), heavier winds and rain (even waterspouts viewable from town, according to Baby Girl and her boyfriend) the evening calm returned. The sky brightened and with drier conditions, the men set to work on dinner.

Here’s the boyfriend with a pair of Uhu he netted earlier in the weekend.

He has a recipe for fish stuffing which comes together something like this.






Husband of next daughter upward fired up the grill for the turf to go along with the surf.



The rest of us made potatoes and rice (Midwest and mid-West Hawaii preferences both accommodated) and salad.

After the many years of raising them, having the now adult generation around to pitch in - whether it’s moving or cooking, driving out on errands or other things I can’t think of right now - is an unforeseen pleasure. It's fun to have them around and great to have helpers.

In Hawai'i, you EAT!

I discovered early on here that in Hawai'i food plays an especially important role in social gatherings. At nearly all events, way more food is put out than can be eaten, apparently with the understanding that everyone attending arrives with an obligation to overeat, which we mostly do.

In the Midwest most people arrive at gatherings feeling obligated to claim to be on some sort of diet. They then proceed to overeat anyway, the difference being that overeating is not viewed as a social obligation. It's more of a voluntary, frequently-indulged option.

Beloved Wife and I were invited to a pig-roast/feast held two days after Thanksgiving this year. Though still bloated from the holiday, I recognized that it might appear to be rude on our part to attend the follow-up feast and then eat only a sufficient amount of food. I therefore determined to craft a plan to achieve an excessive level of food consumption at the feast, one sufficiently large to prevent any misunderstandings and avoid inadvertently appearing aloof or unappreciative of the preparations and hospitality of our hosts.

The Plan I hit on was this: On the "off" day between the two feasts, I would continue to consume the expansive quantities of food necessary to prevent my stomach capacity from diminishing (side note: having just placed as a finisher in the Annual Thanksgiving Day Stomach-Stretching, Eating-Endurance Challenge hosted by our family, and with the upcoming pig-roast a mere day away, I reasoned that it would probably be beneficial to keep my stomach in a state of heightened meal-readiness *alert level orange*).

So, that's what I did. Sure, it was a demanding eating test, forcing me to draw on every ounce of my resolve, but I managed to stick it out. It all comes down to the spirit of aloha. Sometimes you gotta go the extra mile. Just the way I was raised - and a cultural tradition in Hawai'i.

Pleasingly, I can report that all my forethought, planning and commitment to immoderate eating seems to have paid off. We ate a lot (tastiest ulu I've ever eaten), had a good time and left the event on good terms with our hosts. I believe everybody there went home with Ziplocks full of leftovers for later too!